I’m Not Perfect – and other realizations

Hey y’all! Apologies for being so distant lately. Last semester was crazy busy and I was trying to focus on school and not falling apart as a person. But I sit here today, on my couch sicker than a dog, and I have inspiration.

I am more of a definition number 1 right now. Number 2 not so much because of this stupid sinus infection, but anyway.
My inspiration came after looking at some Mindy Kaling quotes (she’s my girl crush and if you don’t know who she is look her up) and thinking back upon this year. I wanted to share with you guys a post that had some applicable value in life – like a recipe or something boring (which I still might do). But as I have spent my day doing absolutely nothing, I really feel like I want to talk about something more real. I know that social media puts a rose colored glass over everything. Everyone can appear however they want: artsy, trendy, pretty, whatever. I just want the people who read this blog to know who I really am. Although I don’t really know who my audience is, I particularly hope this is seen by girls my age and maybe younger, because this realization that I have had has made a miraculous difference in every aspect of my life. So without further ado, let me talk about how
I don’t want this statement to deter you from reading any other part of this post because it is so cliche, but this is so freeing for me to talk about. Since I have been sick at home I have been really hooked up on social media and honestly, I understand why people have so many issues with self esteem. I go through instagram seeing people hanging out with friends, travelling the world on adventures, posting perfect tips and pictures on blogs, being more productive than I am. Honestly, I am done comparing my life to other people. I am done trying to reach “perfection”. So to anyone who knows what I am talking about, here is a list of why I am so not perfect:
-I love to lay in bed all day and watch Netflix. I mean all day. I watched all of season three of Parks and Recreation today. Some of you probably got out of bed at an acceptable hour and did “stuff”. You know what I realized today laying in bed? I honestly sometimes don’t want to do anything. And you know what? That’s totally awesome
-I really never wear makeup or do my hair or look like a normal human being. I see people all the time that look put together. Congrats to them! I used to envy those people, but (let’s be real) I value my sleep and do not feel like spending that much time to look fabulous. I’m not saying that people who take the time to look nice are worse than me, because they’re not. People are different. If you want to get up and look nice for the day, do it! If it makes you happy, please do it! As for me, I will throw my hair in a bun and put on a t-shirt because I love being comfy.
-I make mistakes probably every day of my life and I have made mistakes trying to hide from those mistakes, but that’s the past and I can’t change it now. This one is pretty much self explanatory
-I am so outspoken and it has gotten me in so much trouble since I was a small child. You know what that means? I am strong and passionate and loud. Cool for me. I can practically hear my mom rolling her eyes reading this because she has to listen to me rant about things I see on the news that make me so upset (thanks for listening and being patient mom). But really. For those of you that have lived your life being told to calm down, don’t. Be passionate! Too many people sit passively, which also has it’s merits. But for those of us who can’t seem to keep our mouths shut, don’t even try. Own your personality. Cause a scene. Make a difference.
-I feel so awkward in social situations. I honestly will sometimes not answer a call or a text for days on end because I cannot stand the thought of having to have a conversation with an actual person. I think of myself as an ambivert (kind of a mix between extrovert and introvert). The issue is that people tend to like extrovert me more than introvert me. Well let me just tell you, introversion is just as cool and can be just as fun.
-Sometimes I get mad and pushy and mean. It happens. I try not to hurt other people’s feelings and sometimes fail miserably. It’s called asking for forgiveness and moving on.
-I love to laugh at the weirdest stuff and I honestly do not find it uncool at all. Show me a meme of a cat? I laugh for days. SNL will always be my favorite show. Acting weird in public? I’m down. I think the adult in me has stopped caring about social norms.
-I can’t cook, craft, make the perfect smoky eye, take beautiful photographs, or afford to travel. These seem like a staple for those trendy young bloggers. Honestly, I cannot do any of those things. I have tried and tried to no avail and will continue to put in an effort. I just don’t see how people find the time between naps and movie watching to do all that stuff anyway.
And I know you guys probably think I am going to follow this up with some dumb cheesy list of why it’s okay for me not to be perfect, but I am so serious when I say that I have zero reason to defend the fact that I am not perfect. I don’t have to explain why I act the way I do or why I make the choices I do. And that is the joy of owning my entire being and having confidence in myself.